one thing that helped me was someone pointing out about 4 years ago that "what do you do?" and "how do you make money to live on?" are really 2 very different questions but in our culture they've been smooshed together.
once i learned to unsmoosh them and started practising it, it got easier and easier to asnwer the question the first way.
someone asked me just last night "What DO you do?" (odd emphasis because i'd answered a question and noted i'm not a dr).
i answered "i do intuitive readings, garden (organic and permaculture with a strong focus on edibles and medicinals), research things of interest to me, draw, write, read, cuddle my cats, make ferments, cuddle my cats, knit, felt, take photos, do digital artwork, and lots more.
what do you do?" (i only just noticed now that i put in cuddle my cats twice. yet it's quite appropriate *g*).
i don't know all the t hings you do and i know we have very very different limitations, but i know you sing awesomely, you write, you read, you knit, you play with your kitty, you do (or did) volunteer work for dw (i think?), you adventure/game, you battle sigma. and i'm certain there's more.
i do get being scared. i found i have to ask myself the worst thing that could happen. i don't do things where someone else (human or animal) could come to harm. so no driving the past 6 years. no trying things where the cats could get hurt. no trying things where p could get hurt.
but being laughed at, while painful, is liveable. disappointing ppl is liveable. failing at things is liveable. i still HATE doing them, but i lovelovelove trying new things and enjoying them and sometimes i'm really good at them. and every time i am it gives me more courage to try other new things.
taking baby steps helps me, too. if i look at huge things i get discouraged or overwelmed, but if i tell myself i want to do x and i'm going to just try x and if i like x and i can do x, maybe i'll want to try y, the next step in xyz. but i don't HAVE to, i can only do x if i want. for me it takes a lot of pressure off me.
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branchandroot
no subject
Date: 2011-03-17 03:15 am (UTC)once i learned to unsmoosh them and started practising it, it got easier and easier to asnwer the question the first way.
someone asked me just last night "What DO you do?" (odd emphasis because i'd answered a question and noted i'm not a dr).
i answered "i do intuitive readings, garden (organic and permaculture with a strong focus on edibles and medicinals), research things of interest to me, draw, write, read, cuddle my cats, make ferments, cuddle my cats, knit, felt, take photos, do digital artwork, and lots more.
what do you do?" (i only just noticed now that i put in cuddle my cats twice. yet it's quite appropriate *g*).
i don't know all the t hings you do and i know we have very very different limitations, but i know you sing awesomely, you write, you read, you knit, you play with your kitty, you do (or did) volunteer work for dw (i think?), you adventure/game, you battle sigma. and i'm certain there's more.
i do get being scared. i found i have to ask myself the worst thing that could happen. i don't do things where someone else (human or animal) could come to harm. so no driving the past 6 years. no trying things where the cats could get hurt. no trying things where p could get hurt.
but being laughed at, while painful, is liveable. disappointing ppl is liveable. failing at things is liveable. i still HATE doing them, but i lovelovelove trying new things and enjoying them and sometimes i'm really good at them. and every time i am it gives me more courage to try other new things.
taking baby steps helps me, too. if i look at huge things i get discouraged or overwelmed, but if i tell myself i want to do x and i'm going to just try x and if i like x and i can do x, maybe i'll want to try y, the next step in xyz. but i don't HAVE to, i can only do x if i want. for me it takes a lot of pressure off me.
*fierce hugs* *lovelovelove*