i hear the voices when I'm dreaming

I'm lying here listening to wrath of khan soundtrack and having All The Damn Feels.

Kinda afraid to watch the new trek series because I get the impression it includes Spock (( spoilers )) and I'm afraid they'll mess things up more -- I liked the 2009 Trek AOS but the sesquicentennial
I'm not sure why my tablet thought I meant that instead of sequels .... sequels not so much, and I've ridiculous amounts feels for TOS Spock and so it's like teenager me being all heart-eyes inside and I don't want them to ruin that because teenager me has so few things remaining

and wrath of khan -- plus the sort of trilogy that is WOK/SFS/VH (whales!) -- is solidly my favorite trek movie

I miss my writing and the trek fics I had going
I miss 2009
I miss me
I miss
...

News at 11: isa is a fucked-up-in-the-head insecure clueless little penguin with many issues that are deeply entrenched.

Bonus news: prednisone doesn't actually make these things better.

My brain is freaking *weird*.

Okay, yes, this is not a surprise. But there is no other way to explain the fact that right now -- sleep deprived from "too ow to sleep", in pain (though it's down to, like, 2, on a 1-10 scale; it was 7 last night, then 4 once I found some of my pain meds), drugged to the gills, tired, &c. -- I am about a million times more cheerful and even *productive* than normal.

I mean. I'm not (for the most part) beating myself up about getting hurt again, even though sigma could easily find ways to blame me (I didn't deliberately do anything, but arguably I was careless). I'm finally getting around to doing some of the shit I should have done a long time ago. My computer is having major issues and sluggishness, and it's not even really frustrating me. And when my eyeglasses decided that it would be epic fun to break (one lens popped out, and the screw that holds the frame together is mysteriously not there), instead of flailing or being miserable, I just dug out the phone book, called my eye doctor person (with sufficient apologies for disturbing her at home, but she lives like two blocks away from me and has done home calls before) and she volunteered to come over and dig up my old glasses and help me put them on and take the new glasses and fix them on Monday and bring them back to me.

...

... yeah, I don't even know. *regards self with wry amusement*

(pain meds: a new treatment for depression! okay, so you won't have a brain or be able to stay awake, but who needs that anyway?

Dear universe,

My life has been kind of sucky lately. I mean, really, I'd think you'd get tired of messing with my body, but apparently not.

As compensation, I would please like the following:

* A pony. Preferably a unicorn pony. Maybe with sparkles.

* Porn. Lots of it. Also rum.

* A handful -- four, maybe, two of each gender -- of assistants that I can use for research purposes regarding sex. (When they are off duty they can, um, sleep, or give me backrubs, or make me yummy drinks.)

* A service dog. With one of those talking collars from Up.

* A telepathic mind-to-'paper' device for getting stories out of my head properly.

* A Kindle or other e-book-reader, so I can see whether it's easier to handle than books are. Oh, and plenty of free books.

* A functional teleporter, so that I can have frequent doses of jmtorres. (And also can go to synecdochic's and rb's stitch-and-bitch sessions. And also visit other awesome people. And also go to the coast where it is cool.)

* More penguins.

Thank you.

Sincerely, and a bit loopily,
-ysobel

(apparently, in addition to being a nice painkiller, vicodin makes me babble a lot. who knew?)