meh

* yuletide irc just dumped me out and won't let me connect D: ("connection refused", and my browser can't connect to anything sff.net either) --ETA back up now, but argh. and apparently there was a backup server that some people went to but I didn't know about it? idek

* tried going on to dw irc for the first time in forever, and couldn't ("unable to resolve server")

* back hurts

* want to be knitting but I get frustrated with how different it is when I can't get my hands in the right places

* want to be cross-stitching, but I haven't figured out how to even make that possible again, let alone fun

* feel like I should be wanting to write, and it's not like I don't have things (several wips, secret_mutant assignment, yuletide once assignments go out, yuletide treats) but I just ... can't.

* I have books, but the physicality of it frustrates me

* I feel like I can't do anything and as much as I know rationally that it isn't really *about* what I can *do*, emotionally I am still stuck on OMG WORTHLESS

* whiny complainy posts like this don't really help