(no subject)

Fuckit

So I had half a moment of feeling okay about stuff -- having enough aides for a change --

Only the really cool person developed major medical issues, and one of the other new people is having back problems, and do shifts are falling back on my roommate again, and some of them she literally can't do, and also the -- I was feeling overwhelmed and couldn't do recruiting, and my dad is able to put out advertisements and get names but the follow-up -- explaining shifts, arranging interviews, arranging training) fell for a while onto the person who does my scheduling (another thing I originally did but couldn't) but she can't do they long term and my roommate doesn't want to and I'm not sure what to do

and there's the issue of who stays here overnight if my roommate takes a trip; a bunch of roommates ago, my roommate found replacement and paid them, and then for a long while K would stay but she's not really talking to me any more (the January issues and subsequent taking her off the schedule pretty much burned that bridge), and I can't stay alone but I don't know--

Anyway so I'm back to crying pathetically yaaay (fml)