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Oct. 7th, 2015 03:01 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ysobelI am craving knitting -- but knitting as I used to be able to do it, when I had enough mobility to bring my hands together. I don't know whether the knitting I can do now would satisfy the craving or just frustrate me. (Last I tried, and it's been a while, I could produce knitted fabric but the process was slow and awkward and didn't feel the same.)
I am craving cross-stitch, and the soothing repetitive meditation of pulling needle and floss through fabric; but that too requires mobility I don't have, to separate and align floss threads and to thread the needle and to hold the needle and to get it to the correct spot and to pull it through to the length of the thread. Maybe, possibly, if I had the right equipment, something to thread needles for me (which probably exists) and something that could clamp to the table and hold the frame securely for me while allowing different angles and full 360° rotation (which probably doesn't), maaaaybe then I could use tweezers to get the needle in and through, but for now it's pretty much impossible.
I am craving coloring, but that too requires movement -- if my right hand holds a pencil as if to write, the writing (or coloring) surface has to be pretty much vertical between my hand and my stomach, which means I can't see the surface of the paper because it is edge-on. This is the easiest of the three to "fix", because all I need is a way to extend the effective length of my pencils / markers / crayons so that the tip can reach a desk surface even if my hand can't -- and I do have that, but I lack the horizontal space to spread out, to put everything where I can reach it and also have a place to put what I am coloring on. Flat surfaces get eaten up quickly, because there are few places that I can put things and still reach them.
I really hate my body right now.
I am craving cross-stitch, and the soothing repetitive meditation of pulling needle and floss through fabric; but that too requires mobility I don't have, to separate and align floss threads and to thread the needle and to hold the needle and to get it to the correct spot and to pull it through to the length of the thread. Maybe, possibly, if I had the right equipment, something to thread needles for me (which probably exists) and something that could clamp to the table and hold the frame securely for me while allowing different angles and full 360° rotation (which probably doesn't), maaaaybe then I could use tweezers to get the needle in and through, but for now it's pretty much impossible.
I am craving coloring, but that too requires movement -- if my right hand holds a pencil as if to write, the writing (or coloring) surface has to be pretty much vertical between my hand and my stomach, which means I can't see the surface of the paper because it is edge-on. This is the easiest of the three to "fix", because all I need is a way to extend the effective length of my pencils / markers / crayons so that the tip can reach a desk surface even if my hand can't -- and I do have that, but I lack the horizontal space to spread out, to put everything where I can reach it and also have a place to put what I am coloring on. Flat surfaces get eaten up quickly, because there are few places that I can put things and still reach them.
I really hate my body right now.
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Date: 2015-10-07 10:52 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2015-10-08 09:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2015-10-09 04:41 am (UTC)I suspect it's not going to completely scratch the itch, just because some of what I miss is tactile -- like the feel of colored pencil (dry and scratchy) or crayon (waxy) or marker (wet and smooth) against the paper -- but if will at least help somewhat.
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Date: 2015-10-09 04:44 am (UTC)Yeah, it doesn't scratch the physicality itch, and hte colors are a bit limited, but it's still fairly soothing!