(no subject)

[ysobel]

Feeling very Not Myself today... partly a migraine hangover from yesterday, partly one of those days where little things kept going wrong, partly I don't even know what. Very crappy mood, sort of angrily despair-hate for no reason. Stuff that's similar to brainweasels I get but on steroids and just kind of Off. Spent the day half crying half reading (books not Twitter for a change). I wanted to just turn myself off until tomorrow. Like I'd gotten up wrong somehow. (The fact that 2/3 of today's shifts were a caregiver I don't particularly like and find annoying but can't afford to not have her, didn't help.)

Are there, like, medical reasons why moods can tank abruptly? Like, I know utis in old people can present like dementia. Or maybe it's just migraine exhaustion idk. Bet if I checked WebMD it'd suggest brain bleed and/or hangnail...

Comments

[vass]

In autistic people this is definitely a Known Thing. If health problems are eating all the spoons you'd normally use for coping with sensory or mood stuff, then suddenly everything is harder.

[killing_rose]

What Vass said also goes for ADHD, as I understand it. I know if I'm devoting my spoons to x and that's Not What I Wanted To, it is gonna fuck up something else (often my mood, if I have had to deal with Shit I Dislike). And I'm usually disregulated post-migraine, which is something I always forget because I Wanna Be Fine. (And able bodied, so my brain continues to shoot for alternate universes.)

[ysobel]

Yeah that's definitely part of it ... and i don't even have the option of Not Dealing With People, even when I'm in a very anti people mood, because caregivers, so there's this spiral of health issues taking the spoons I need for peopling and then people taking the spoons for coping with health stuff and it just gets worse and worse.

(My mom doesn't help matters either. Even on the best days she is spoon-intensive. And if I silence my phone so I don't get irritated at text notification sounds, she pesters me through other methods...)

[ysobel]

Oh right, disregulation is a thing. That's exactly what yesterday felt like. 💜