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Oct. 6th, 2023 09:07 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ysobelCW aging pet and brainweasels thereof. (He's ok, my brain is an AH)
Yahtzee was in my room a lot tonight, licking my leg some (he has a very gentle sweet lick) and just hanging out.
My brain is looping on "he knows he's going to die tonight/soon and is saying bye", which would be more compelling if it didn't say that every damn time he does anything. But I also can't stop wondering how long he has. (His birthday is in ten days; he will be 14. I'm not sure how to spoil him properly.)
I also wonder if he ever wishes he had a different person, someone able to interact physically, someone better at going for walks, someone who actually had a life. He was amazing for me but I'm not sure I was amazing for him.
Telling him I love him doesn't feel like enough.
Yahtzee was in my room a lot tonight, licking my leg some (he has a very gentle sweet lick) and just hanging out.
My brain is looping on "he knows he's going to die tonight/soon and is saying bye", which would be more compelling if it didn't say that every damn time he does anything. But I also can't stop wondering how long he has. (His birthday is in ten days; he will be 14. I'm not sure how to spoil him properly.)
I also wonder if he ever wishes he had a different person, someone able to interact physically, someone better at going for walks, someone who actually had a life. He was amazing for me but I'm not sure I was amazing for him.
Telling him I love him doesn't feel like enough.