i hear the voices when I'm dreaming

Um.

So melissima asked for Anti-Valentine fic.

Somehow, my brain translated this to deathfic.

Don't ask.

( three drabbles, all with death warnings I AM TOTALLY NOT JOKING AT ALL wtf brain )

...

...yeah. I tried for porn, really I did...! *sigh* Dangit. I think I need ice cream now.

I. (spn)

Dean doesn't like Halloween much. Of course, none of them do, and he doesn't *hate* it the way Dad does and Sam sorta does, but he doesn't like it. More to the point, he doesn't understand it.

An excuse to gorge on candy? Sure. But that's what Easter's for.

Dressing up as monsters, though... What the hell's the point? For one thing, there's enough scary stuff out there that's *really* scary, not just a fake rubber mask and fake plastic fangs and fake scary that wouldn't scare anyone.

For another, people tend to be scary enough just on their own.



II. (white collar)

"Oh, you've got to be kidding me," Peter groans, when Neal walks in to the office in full Dracula getup, cape and all.

Neal bares too-pointy teeth and fucking *stalks* forward, cape flaring behind him. It's black with red lining, of course, and doesn't look like some cheap dollar store thing. "I vant to suck your blud," he says with a dramatically overdone accent.

Peter does not let himself smile, even a little bit. No sense encouraging the madness. "Suck on this." He holds up a cup of coffee as bribe and barrier.

Neal doesn't blink. "I never drink... coffee."



III. (blood ties)

"Come on," Coreen pleaded. "Party! It'll be fun! You do remember what fun is, don't you?"

Vicki didn't pause. "No costume," she pointed out, gesturing at herself, "and no time."

"Not my thing," Henry said impassively.

Later, Vicki looked curiously him. "Halloween's not your thing? Even with the--" She snapped her teeth together a couple of times. "--thing?"

"While the celebration of Halloween has been a fascinating social phenomenon to observe over the years," he said, sharply, "being a vampire does not make Halloween easier, nor vice versa."

"What does? --never mind, none of my business."

You, Henry didn't say.



IV. (numb3rs)

The one CalSci Halloween party that Charlie went to was, generally speaking, a place for the partygoers to out-geek each other. Obscure physics and math jokes abounded. As, apparently, did wordplay: one grad student came in a bright yellow lemon costume with "-N" written on it. (After all, spoken aloud, "lemon" without the final n did sound rather like "lemma"...)

His first year, Charlie managed to win the (prizeless but much coveted) best costume title. Pine branches and tinsel adorned his limbs, and a string of lights wound around him. On his nametag, he had written only this: "31 Oct = 25 Dec".