Some observations

1) Getting a Goldilocks amount of sleep is awesome. (Usually I either a) wake up an hour or so before my aide is supposed to show up, then doze off and slip into dreamstate so that I am all off kilter when I get woken up, or b) sleep until I can't sleep any more (which is sort of like eating until you're stuffed), but today I managed to hit a good amount.)

2) 68 (F; 20 C) and sunny is my favorite sort of weather omg. (I know we need rain, but I love this so very much.)

3) My cousin's baby is the cutest baby ever, I swear.

4) I am still not writing much but I am starting to be able to sort of ... tell snippets to myself in my head, is the only way I can describe it? Which is at least progress?

5) My good mood of today (see especially points 1 and 2 above) was kind of dampened by reading an article on someone who has FOP (the same condition I have) but whose only restrictions are in the left hip and in her jaw, and I got kind of overwhelmed with massive resentment towards someone who is ~struggling bravely~ (not really her words, but the tone of the article and comments) when I have so much more restriction, and I know it's not fair because a) FOP is scary as shit because of the progressive aspect and worrying about the future and b) just because person A "has it worse" than person B doesn't mean person B's problems aren't significant, but that doesn't actually get rid of the resentment, just add an anvil of self-loathing, which doesn't help anything

6) I have a post brewing about legitimizing/honoring emotions, but ... now would not be a good time. /eyes brain/

Bonus observation

...meant to post this with the last entry but forgot:

It is a hell of a lot easier for me to enforce boundaries on behalf of those in my care than for myself.

Cross my boundaries, and I tend to ... retreat, withdraw, but remain awkwardly polite.

Cross the boundaries of one of my pets? Oh hell no.

(Monkey established fairly early on the spaces she considers safe hideouts, foremostly the upper shelves in the usually-closed side of my closet. One of my PAs interacts with her a bit harrassingly, which seems to me to be his default for pets. I found myself this morning having to enforce the "leave her alone when she is in the closet" rule, without hesitating, and going on to explain that the closet was her safe space and I was not willing to compromise that by letting anyone pursue her once she's gone there.)

(It's partly pet common sense -- a cat that is not allowed a place to escape, who has no option to say "leave me alone" and have that be respected, is a cat that is more likely to attack. It's partly a matter of empathy; my PA is a lot more social and a lot less likely than I am to have experienced a need for sanctuary. And it's partly just a thing of holy fuck I can actually stand up to someone that is just mind-bogglingly unusual for me.)