fuckity

one of my caregivers is semi-quitting until the enrollment paperwork gets completed [he went through a different county, on my roommate's suggestion, only it turns out the training doesn't transfer] which won't be until at least january

and I was hoping I could talk my dad into a loan -- pay him privately, to be repaid when he gets paid properly -- but my dads attitude is the delay is his fault

and I'd do it personally but my dad gets mad if I do [he can deduct medical expenses] and anyway I'm a little sulky

but I don't know what to do and I don't have enough people and sometimes I think it'd be easier if I just applied for MAID so I just could stop being stressed and stop being a useless burden