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Feb. 14th, 2019 03:43 amPretty sure the universe hates me right now.
Point: my chair is semi broken. Last week I went to go somewhere and *couldn't get out of the van* because motor 2 was disconnected. It took 45 minutes and two (strong) people to get me out -- luckily once I got back inside, the chair started behaving again, but I am afraid to go anywhere in case I get stuck, either in the van again or outside someplace. The theory is that something in the right-side motor is loose/worn enough that the disengage lever slips out of fully locked. (Which also means it's totally unrelated to the joystick falling off earlier.) They've ordered new parts but this tends to be the sort of thing that, based on delivery times, is handmade by Tibetan unicorns in the light of a full moon and then shipped via narcoleptic yak.
It's been a week, and so far I've missed a book group discussion that only meets every other month, reiki, choir rehearsal, soul collage, and I forgot what else but fuck. Also all three pets had vet appointments, so my aide had to go be my proxy.
Point: my brain feels like it has somehow short-circuited because stress and because I don't know if the chair will die completely or when it will be fixed. i can't focus on anything or do anything or ... anything.
Point: the aide that was leaving at the end of the month? Apparently the other client needs her sooner so as of Monday she can't work for me in the afternoons. She's still doing her two morning shifts through the end of feb, but not the three afternoon ones. I found this out tonight.
Point: the power went out at around midnight and stayed out for two hours. Something was beeping. My bed (alternating air pressure mattress) requires power. My cpap requires power. My fan requires power. Too hot and uncomfortable to sleep. And I couldn't even distract myself with Netflix because internet requires power (and while I do have videos on my iPad, I didn't want to drain the battery down and have nothing, if the power stayed out). I got the cpap hoses disconnected so I could breathe (it is very awkward and stifling to try to breathe through the filters and stuff when it's unpowered) ... but then when the power came back on couldn't get it connected again (partly hecause the hose attached to my face mask isn't quite long enough for me to hold well, partly because I can't bring my hands together) so I had to wake my roommate up. Which is, granted, one of the reasons she's here, but I still hate doing it.
Point: it is ::squints at clock:: 3:30 and I am not asleep and my brain doesn't want to go to sleep (it's like a very small toddler, just less mobile). I'm also hungry and craving sugar, but I haven't figured out a way to eat stuff in bed, and anyway shouldn't be having a lot of sugar, though I'm thinking of saying fuck it and just gorging on chocolate tomorrow, because who fucking cares if it's healthy, give me all the sugars.
Point: my chair is semi broken. Last week I went to go somewhere and *couldn't get out of the van* because motor 2 was disconnected. It took 45 minutes and two (strong) people to get me out -- luckily once I got back inside, the chair started behaving again, but I am afraid to go anywhere in case I get stuck, either in the van again or outside someplace. The theory is that something in the right-side motor is loose/worn enough that the disengage lever slips out of fully locked. (Which also means it's totally unrelated to the joystick falling off earlier.) They've ordered new parts but this tends to be the sort of thing that, based on delivery times, is handmade by Tibetan unicorns in the light of a full moon and then shipped via narcoleptic yak.
It's been a week, and so far I've missed a book group discussion that only meets every other month, reiki, choir rehearsal, soul collage, and I forgot what else but fuck. Also all three pets had vet appointments, so my aide had to go be my proxy.
Point: my brain feels like it has somehow short-circuited because stress and because I don't know if the chair will die completely or when it will be fixed. i can't focus on anything or do anything or ... anything.
Point: the aide that was leaving at the end of the month? Apparently the other client needs her sooner so as of Monday she can't work for me in the afternoons. She's still doing her two morning shifts through the end of feb, but not the three afternoon ones. I found this out tonight.
Point: the power went out at around midnight and stayed out for two hours. Something was beeping. My bed (alternating air pressure mattress) requires power. My cpap requires power. My fan requires power. Too hot and uncomfortable to sleep. And I couldn't even distract myself with Netflix because internet requires power (and while I do have videos on my iPad, I didn't want to drain the battery down and have nothing, if the power stayed out). I got the cpap hoses disconnected so I could breathe (it is very awkward and stifling to try to breathe through the filters and stuff when it's unpowered) ... but then when the power came back on couldn't get it connected again (partly hecause the hose attached to my face mask isn't quite long enough for me to hold well, partly because I can't bring my hands together) so I had to wake my roommate up. Which is, granted, one of the reasons she's here, but I still hate doing it.
Point: it is ::squints at clock:: 3:30 and I am not asleep and my brain doesn't want to go to sleep (it's like a very small toddler, just less mobile). I'm also hungry and craving sugar, but I haven't figured out a way to eat stuff in bed, and anyway shouldn't be having a lot of sugar, though I'm thinking of saying fuck it and just gorging on chocolate tomorrow, because who fucking cares if it's healthy, give me all the sugars.